Are You Ready to Lead?

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When Helen Norris first joined GriefShare, she was still reeling from the sudden loss of her husband. Leadership was the last thing on her mind. She wasn’t seeking a platform, she just needed healing. Yet, as she faithfully attended her sessions when she could, something started to stir. “I kept feeling the Spirit nudging me,” she recalls. “Eventually, I just said yes.”

Ministry begins with a nudge

Helen didn’t sign up to lead. In fact, she didn’t even think she was ready to lead, much less guide others through their grief. Driving 15 miles to and from the closest GriefShare group, Helen says that after the first session, “I couldn’t tell you why, I just knew I felt better. So I decided to go back and sit through two more.”.

After missing two weeks because of an emergency at her job, she returned for the seventh session and completed the cycle. That one small “yes” turned into another. Eventually, she attended a second 13-week cycle, referring others to GriefShare along the way.

It wasn’t until an elderly friend in her community suffered a devastating loss that Helen realized the few options of finding support nearby. Helen went on the GriefShare site to search for a GriefShare group nearby to recommend and discovered there wasn’t one within an hour’s drive of where her friend lived. That’s when Helen’s next “yes” came, not from a feeling of preparedness, but from a simple desire to help.

“I was just trying to help someone find a group, and ended up starting one.”

The lie of “I’m not ready”

Helen’s story isn’t unique. Many leaders begin just like she did—still hurting, still unsure, still believing someone else would step up. There’s a common assumption that spiritual leadership requires complete healing, but healing isn’t a finish line. Sometimes, we find it in the act of serving.

“I wasn’t seeking a leadership role necessarily,” Helen explains. “I just wanted to see if God was calling me to do it.”

And the call kept coming. Social media ads. Emails. Invitations. Nudges she couldn’t shake. At first, even her former leader told her, “You’re not ready.” And Helen agreed. “I wasn’t desiring to do it, but I couldn’t ignore it either.”

After going through the program she eventually approached her church about hosting a group. They had prayed for a ministry that would meet a real need. “Most everyone in our congregation had experienced a major loss,” she says. GriefShare was something they could do, something that mattered.

From grieving to guiding

Today, Helen leads a group of 16 people, many from her church, some from the broader community. Several have lost spouses or children. Others are navigating complex grief within blended families. Through it all, Helen shows up, listens, and lets God speak through her.

She’s careful to prepare each week by rewatching the session videos ahead of time, taking notes, and identifying moments that might be especially emotional. “I want to be ready, not just logistically, but spiritually. So that I don’t say anything careless that could hurt someone.”

Despite all the doubts and hesitations, she knows she’s where she’s supposed to be.

“I don’t think it was a mistake to do this. I’ve seen how much the program helped me, and now I get to help others.”

Are you willing?

Helen’s journey reminds us that leadership isn’t about perfection, it’s about availability. You might not feel spiritually “strong enough” or emotionally “healed enough.” Often, the people who are most effective in ministry are the ones who still remember what it feels like to hurt.

If you’re sensing a nudge, don’t ignore it. Take time to discern, pray, and prepare—whether you are months out from your loss or beginning to feel stale, this tool can help you ask the right questions before saying yes.