If you’ve ever thought about leading a GriefShare group and thought, “I’m not equipped,” you’re not alone.
Beverly Burton thought the same thing. [embed https://vimeo.com/manage/videos/1110361971]
After losing both of her sons in a car accident, she accepted an invitation not only to attend GriefShare—but to co-lead. “I was like, really? I’m not sure I can do this,” she remembers.
And yet, she said yes. Today, Beverly has been leading GriefShare groups for over seven years. Through that journey, she’s discovered something important:
You don’t need all the answers to lead a GriefShare group—you just need a heart to listen.
Beverly’s leadership style isn’t flashy. It’s not about teaching, preaching, or fixing people’s pain.
“I always tell people, ‘I don’t have all the answers,’” she says. “We’re not here to tell anyone how to feel. The way you feel is the way you feel.”
And it’s precisely that humility that makes participants feel safe.
Beverly emphasizes that GriefShare isn’t about being the expert in the room. “You know that you’re doing what God made you to do when your heart doesn’t palpitate, and you’re not sweating bullets. You just sit there and listen.”
For many potential leaders, the biggest roadblock isn’t time or energy—it’s fear.
These are valid and important questions. If you’re unsure whether you’re ready to lead, there’s a helpful tool that can give you clarity. Our grief self-assessment can help you reflect on where you are in your own healing process. It’s a simple, guided way to assess if now is the right time for you to lead—or if you may need more time.
Beverly understands that fear. But she’s learned something powerful along the way: People don’t need your solutions. They just need your presence.
“My job is to create a space where people feel like they can say what they need to say,” she explains. “Some of them have told me they feel safer sharing in GriefShare than they do with their own families.”
That’s the power of presence.
Beverly is intentional about the tone she sets in each group.
“I go over the guidelines every time. I tell them, ‘You don’t have to speak until you’re ready. You don’t have to share if you don’t want to.’ I’m very adamant about that.”
She also sets gentle boundaries so everyone can feel heard. “I try to help folks be mindful of how long they share. And I encourage the group to respect one another’s stories.”
But the most powerful tool Beverly uses?
Listening.
“I think people are surprised that GriefShare isn’t just sitting around crying,” she says. “Yes, we do cry. But we also laugh. We build friendships. We witness healing.”
That environment doesn’t happen because Beverly has all the answers. It happens because she listens—without judgment and without trying to fix.
When leaders let go of the pressure to be perfect, something beautiful happens: people open up.
One participant told Beverly, “I’ve never said this out loud before.”
Another woman, who lost her husband and came to the group just two weeks after his death, found unexpected comfort in small things, like her neighbor weed-whacking her yard. “She came in with a smile on her face,” Beverly recalls. “She found gratefulness in something that seemed so small. That’s when you know the group is working.”
Over time, many participants become friends. Some meet for monthly dinners. Others go on to help lead future groups. But it all begins with one thing: a safe space. And that starts with a leader who’s willing to show up and listen.
If you’re grieving—or if you’ve walked through loss in the past—your story may be precisely what someone else needs.
You don’t need to be a counselor. You don’t need a theology degree. You don’t even need to have it all together.
What you do need is a willingness to show up, listen well, and trust God to do the healing.
Let God use your story. Download the Quick Start Guide to take your next step into leadership.